I need some talk-therapy for a few moments. Do you mind?

Been pondering my internet presence…on how “private” I should be or not. How far to take my minor popularity here in the interwebs. For instance…

I am thinking about getting my name as a domain name. My brother has one. Lots of other people have one. I am scared of having one. The fear is a weird-o reaction to what I do on this here platform.

IĀ  write some personal stuff, though less so than before. I want to have kids but you all do not hear about the endless TTC chatter. [You can thank me in the comments section.] Clothing is a personal thing; though less personal if one dresses against societal norms. People want to know what is up but are just too mean or polite to ask. So I blog…

What my deeeep down fears are that the IRL people will know the Internet Me, which is close to the IRL me, but not. You get it for reals from me, I promise, sometimes more real than the IRL people. Disjointed Universe of the Mind. Ha ha ha.

The other fear is that people from my past (though getting more distant with the years) will find out what I am doing and slander me. My Past is rpfoundly ugly. I did incredibly Stupid Stuff. If the fact that I use the word “crap” bothers you on this here blog, you would faint right away at the Sinful Horror I was 7-9 years ago. My life NOW is a testimony to Christ and to the love of family, friends, who have picked up the tattered pieces of me again and again.

Maybe I need a domain name as a healing tool. I might get slandered if those of my past have a big enough gumption to do it. But what of it? I have repented and changed and keep repenting and changing. That Old Way of Doing Things is no longer this Anna. The New Way of Doing things (with a headscarf and skirt and prayer) is helping shape me into forms I never thought possible 9 years ago. Glory to God for ALL things!


6 Responses to “Internet…”

  1. 1 Katrina November 16, 2009 at 3:38 pm

    We’re all new people in Christ so I’d not worry about the past.

    I’m re-venturing into headcovering and I love your blog! šŸ™‚ It’s very cool to read about Orthodox as well.

    I sadly sometimes can make a sailor blush, it’s a thorn in my side. I REALLY have to work on not cussing amongst other things.

    It’s funny, the “internet” me is me but my family knows the real me best. I think we all have sort of a different persona online than in real life. In the online world I’m super chatty but I’m terribly antisocial in real lfe. šŸ™‚

  2. 2 Michele Forrest November 16, 2009 at 6:55 pm

    I so get this. I’m praying for wisdom for you to know what’s the best choice for you.

    Love, CM

  3. 3 Carol November 17, 2009 at 8:32 am

    Personally, I concur with what has been said. You should do what works for you, and what you feel called to do, and not worry about what the people in your past does and says.

    Also, thank you for sharing bits of yourself with us here on the ‘net. You are an inspiration to me and I’m sure to many of us!

    God bless you.

  4. 4 Kristie November 17, 2009 at 9:09 am

    I have the same thoughts about my blogging life and IRL stuff. I am often torn by how much to share, because my family does popover and read my blog, and I have already had my mother take a blog the wrong way. In many ways my blog IS the REAL me, minus all the shyness that I battle daily. My past was horrid as well, and I thank God for the changes He has done, I just pray that its a beautiful testimony. I feel God leads me to blog about some topics, and there are others that He tells me are not OK at this time.

    I love to read your blog, and I appreciate your struggles *and* restraint in the proper areas šŸ™‚ Just follow God, and not worry about your past. If someone from your past started slandering you on here, I don’t think it would change how many of us regular reader thought of you šŸ™‚

  5. 5 thegeekywife November 17, 2009 at 4:28 pm

    First, no, I don’t mind the talk therapy thing! šŸ™‚
    Second, I have never met you IRL, but you seem like such a cool person. I too struggle with how/what/when I blab on the interwebz. BUT, you don’t seem to reveal too much detail. It seems your blog is very focused WRT topics, which is one reason I kept lurking and eventually de-lurked!

    I think a domain might be a bit premature and just another expense, really… you blog here, you have a youtube channel, you have etsy. A domain name would just lump all those together. Here on WordPress you can say it all. And when you ARE elbow-deep in diapers, you probably won’t have time or energy to maintain it. (I don’t have kids either so what do I know, right?)

    Go Daddy has excellent domain rates. Square Space seems really cool but I’m not sure what they charge.

    Finally, I wasn’t a saint either. I still get yelled at by mom for “crap” but I think she would prefer that to BBBBLLLLEEEEEPPPPPP.

    Peace, Janelle

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November 2009
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"I can't say I don't believe in your God, but I don't believe He meant the world to be as it is." ~Nicholas Higgins. North and South.

"I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It's when you know you are licked before you begin but you begin anyway and you see it through no matter what." No idea where that last quote came from, but I like it!

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